Music/Events/Other

Jeffrey Ross (Magic City Casino- Miami)

Posted on June 12th, 2015 · Miami Music/Events/Other · 3 Comments »

* Jeffrey Ross.

Unless you’re from Mars, Venus, Uranius- you know who Jeffrey Ross is …

Ross’ appearances- on Comedy Central’s Celebrity Roasts are legendary…

Trust Jeff Eats when I tell you- one of the funniest comedians working the circuit today. Ross can go blue or clean- and either way- have you crying from laughter.

Real simple…

Jeff Eats and Mrs. Jeff Eats are going…and you should too!

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JEFFREY ROSS
Event Date: Saturday, July 11, 2015 at 9:00 pm
Facility: Stage 305
PLEASE NOTE:
– YOU MUST BE 21 OR OLDER TO ATTEND THIS EVENT.

Tickets: $30 & $75 at magiccitycasino.com
– Tickets for VIP Tables must be purchased in quantities of 4. These tickets are $75 each for a total of $300 per table. Please enter 4 in quantity box when purchasing a VIP Table.
– Purchase of a VIP Table includes a bottle of champagne.
– VIP Tables are located around the stage.
– Show will be performed at Stage 305.

Magic City Casino
450 Nw 37th Ave, Miami, FL 33125
Cross Streets: Between NW 4th St and NW 4th Ter
Neighborhoods: Flagami
(305) 649-3000
magiccitycasino.com
Open:
Sunday-Thursday 10am-4am
Friday-Saturday 10am-5am
_______
About The Roastmaster
Called “an heir apparent to such old-school masters as Buddy Hackett and Rodney Dangerfield” by the New York Times, Jeffrey Ross is feared and revered for his appearances at celebrity roasts. He also stars in a stand-up DVD, Jeffrey Ross: No Offense, as well as an award-winning documentary about his time entertaining U.S. troops in Iraq, Patriot Act: A Jeffrey Ross Home Movie. Jeff divides his time between New York, Los Angeles, and the road.

A Message From The Roastmaster General
My name is Jeffrey Ross, but I am commonly known as the Roastmaster General. I’m not entirely sure how I got this title, but it has stuck and I am proud of it. Most stand-up comics are self-deprecating. I’m all-deprecating. Sure, I occasionally make fun of myself — but I specialize in making fun of others. I’m what is commonly known as an insult comic. Diss is my life.

I never planned on making fun of people for a living. It happened by accident. In fact, my whole life has been a series of happy and not-so-happy accidents that have transformed me into the black belt in busting balls that I am today. I like being known as the meanest man in comedy, but I must admit that it’s a blessing and a curse. It’s not a bad way to make a living, but every now and then somebody wants to kill me.

AmericanBreakfastDessertsFast Food

Walmart’s Glazed Donuts

Posted on June 12th, 2015 · American Breakfast Desserts Fast Food · 6 Comments »

* Walmart’s Glazed Donuts.

There is an old French saying (then again, maybe it’s an old German saying) “Any port in a storm.”

With that in mind, even though “they”” aren’t your-so called gourmet-donuts…Walmart’s Glazed Donuts at $3.98 for a baker’s dozen are welcome in Jeff Eats’ kitchen -anytime day or night!

Trust me on this one, at roughly 30 cents a piece this is “good stuff.”

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Music/Events/Other

No Limit Hold’em Tournament (Mardi Gras Casino- Hallandale Beach)

Posted on June 12th, 2015 · Hallandale Beach Music/Events/Other · No Comments »

* No Limit Hold’em Tournament.

I don’t know about you, but every so often Jeff Eats finds him watching tv-“poker” programs.

With that in mind, I’m gonna use $360 of my bar mitzvah money- and on June 27, 2015 see if my-tv-watching taught me anything!

I’m in…

If you are interested in getting beat…

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Music/Events/Other

My Vegan Heart: How Changing My Diet Changed My Life

Posted on June 11th, 2015 · Music/Events/Other · 7 Comments »

* My Vegan Heart: How Changing My Diet Changed My Life.

Jeff Eats just read the “below” story on everydayhealth.com.

Got two questions for “its” author:

If what you say is so…Then why did GOD create all of these freaking cows, pigs and chickens not to mention the George Foreman Grill?

If you are as healthy as you claim to be…Why do you look like death warmed over?
_______

My Vegan Heart: How Changing My Diet Changed My Life

By Everyday Health Guest Contributor

Published Jan 15, 2014

Thomas Larson

By Thomas Larson, Special to Everyday Health

Thomas-Larson

After my third heart attack in five years, I became a vegan, or a plant-based eater. Then I wrote about it in my book, The Sanctuary of Illness: A Memoir of Heart Disease, which tells the journey of my having gone from a non-recovery recovery to healing after those near-fatal trials,which finally forced me to change my diet.

I was already a vegetarian, a “right” eater — or so I thought. That earlier journey began thirty years ago, while reading Francis Moore Lappe’s ground-breaking book Diet for a Small Planet. I was shaken to the core by the scale of factory farming and clear-cutting of Central American rain forests by McDonalds and other fast-food corporations.

Back then, like tens of thousands of my fellow climate-conscious, meat-is-murder, animal-sparing Californians (I wish I could say Americans), I renounced all sides of beef, bird, and goat. But not their edible byproducts — those tasty commodities like chicken eggs, whole milk, Swiss cheese, vanilla yogurt, and deep-dish pizza.

Yes, I ate right for the sake of the animal’s corporeal life but not for the sake of the planet’s: animal waste is the number one source of methane, scourge of global-warming. I was also not eating right for the sake of my arteries.

But by becoming vegan, I underwent a metamorphosis. I gave up every quarter of the cow for one simple–albeit less-than-obvious–reason: dairy is the devil.

How do I know?

Consider how my traumas and treatments unraveled.

Heart attack #1 — angioplasty, three stents, and a statin drug save me.

Heart attack #2 — angioplasty, one stent, increased exercise, more drugs and higher doses save me.

Heart attack #3 — angioplasty, two stents, more drugs . . . save — no. Stop! Why do my arteries keep occluding? Why do I keep getting saved but not getting better?

I renewed my study. I found books and a couple movies on plant diets for heart patients. I consulted two lipidologists who ordered detailed blood panels and targeted with supplements the bad strains of cholesterol that continually clogged me.

And, finally, I learned this truth: my arteries inflame at those passageways where lipid deposits jelly-up as vulnerable plaque, that is, plaque likely to burst and block — because of two things. First is my dairy-rich diet and my inability (not that I’d ever really tried) to quit eating eggs and cheese. Second is the spongy cast of my arteries. These are gene-bred from my father, which for him, my older brother, and me guaranteed that we Larsons accrue sludgy pustules of cholesterol in our coronaries, just as Tim Russert and James Gandolfini did (to name two spectacular falls). Thereby, we were more susceptible to cardiac arrest (a.k.a., sudden death) than most Americans.

So, could it be any clearer that the only thing left for me to do, in addition to interventional treatment, exercise, and drugs, was to give up dairy and eat plants? No animal protein. Just plants. Which I did.

What do plants offer?
1.No cholesterol and no casein, artery-closers extraordinaire
2.Easily assimilated nitrous oxide, key to arterial self-repair
3.Plenty of protein that’s nutritionally more beneficial than protein from animals
4.Soluble fiber for bowel regularity
5.A stomach-pleasing ban on hard-to-metabolize fat
6.Enhanced sexual potency in males and females
7.Less end-of-life disability
8.Prevention of some cancers

I did ride a rough road from veggie to vegan. In addition to their initial canyon-ledge terror, my heart attacks were confusingly mild and harsh. Mild because each attack, for which I rushed myself to the nearest hospital (it’s smarter to call 911), was less grave than the preceding one, which made me think I was getting better. The statin drug, post-number-one, helped defuse the severity as well. Harsh because the infarctions came three times — carpet-bagging relatives who wouldn’t leave — which meant I was not getting better and my healing regimen was not rooting out the cause. This further said that at the rate I was going, I was never going to improve.

However, I did improve — but only after I discovered that what went in my mouth made me sick and kept me sick. I improved, dramatically, after I cut out the cow.

A plant-based diet is a friend with many benefits — I rarely have angina or other chest pains. I dropped thirty-five pounds; I don’t count calories; I don’t diet. I seldom suffer heartburn, so I don’t think it’s masked angina (I used to). I can drink red wine; my LDL is super low (46) as is my total cholesterol (106) and my arteries are less inflamed than they were. My sex life has been reborn with a fit, desirous partner. And while I do have the occasional fatigue-ridden day, it’s probably my old plaques, packed in during my dairy days, still seeping into, and gumming up, my stented coronaries.

I’ll trade that last misfortune for all the other post-vegan advantages.

THOMAS LARSON: Journalist, critic, and memoirist, Thomas Larson has been a staff writer for the San Diego Reader for fifteen years. His books include The Memoir and the Memoirist and The Saddest Music Ever Written: The Story of Samuel Barber’s “Adagio for Strings.” He is also a creative nonfiction instructor at Ashland

AmericanItalianPizza

Tanzy Restaurant (Boca Raton)

Posted on June 11th, 2015 · American Boca Raton Italian Pizza · 2 Comments »

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tanzy2

***** Tanzy Restaurant, 301 Plaza Real, Boca Raton, Florida 33432, (561) 922-6699.

For our purposes let’s call Tanzy Restaurant an Italian restaurant/with plenty of American stuff. The joint is located in Mizner Park in Boca Raton and is owned/operated by iPic Entertainment which operates the 11 screen movie theater at the same location.

Real simple tale on this one…

Last Tuesday night (6/9)-Jeff Eats and Mrs. Jeff Eats were invited to attend a Media Dinner…first things first, everything that we ate/drank was “comped”…also in attendance- give or take 25-of South Florida’s most influential food bloggers and various reporters/critics. Jeff Eats didn’t do a full name check, but I did see the Sun Sentinel’s food critic- Susan Bryant- so be on the lookout for a Tanzy story probably sometime next week. Also spotted, a number of writers who work for those- free glossy magazines (that you never ordered) that you get in the mail-and that you read (well, at least in Jeff Eats’ case) in the toilet -usually concentrating on the back-pages’ charity event photos-seeing if you know anyone!

As for the outing,

Tanzy is an absolutely gorgeous restaurant…full bar area, flat screen tvs (do they still make fat screen ones?) The joint kinda looks upscale, but trust Jeff Eats, it’s cool enough to easily handle your tee shirt/shorts/flip flops. In the 3-hours (7pm-10pm) that us-Eats were there- the restaurant was very busy and the crowd was all-ages wearing all types of garb! By the way, Mrs. Jeff Eats said to tell you guys- actually I guess it’s you gals, that Tanzy’s ladies room is one of the best looking that she has ever been in! So, Caitlyn Jenner- take note!

Printed down below is the Media Dinner Menu…tons of different dishes to try. No bs-here, Jeff Eats and Mrs. Jeff Eats “sampled” every food-item and I gotta tell you that other than the braised angus beef short ribs the food was right on the money…just so you know those short ribs, reminded Jeff Eats of my late mother-in-law’s pot roast, shall we say, not a good situation!- Mrs. Jeff Eats kinda begrudgingly agreed!

Like I said before, Media Dinner…so you’ll have to decide for yourself if Tanzy’s menu/prices work for you! Jeff Eats’ “menu review” (tanzyrestaurant.com)- says everyone in your party will find what to eat at a reasonable price!

Let me wrap this up for you, unless Tanzy’s GM pulled off some massive scam, like “getting” the-delicious food and super attentive wait-staff from another restaurant… Tanzy is definitely a winner.

Tanzy Restaurant is open Monday-Thursday 11:30am-10pm, Friday 11:30am-11pm, Saturday 11am-11pm, Sunday 11am-10pm.

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AmericanDessertsFast FoodMusic/Events/Other

Jaxson’s Ice Cream Parlor to Announce the Winner of the Broward 100 Ice Cream Contest- The “Scoop of The a Century” (Dania Beach)

* Jaxson’s Ice Cream Parlor to Announce the Winner of the Broward 100 Ice Cream Flavor Contest- The “Scoop of the Century.”

The Broward County Office of Public Communications “asked” for some help-to spread the word about this event…so in the interest of doing its fair share of public service, Jeff Eats is printing the “below” pr-release! Between you guys and Jeff Eats, the whole thing seems a bit lame to me- but hey- what do I know? Personally, I’m thinking- 100th Anniversary, that at the least, the contest-winner should be getting 25 Kitchen Sinks for-4 over the next year!- and for all those who show up to sample Broward 100 ice cream- a $100 credit for psychiatric care -for running to Jaxson’s for a-sample in the first place!-unless the sample being handed out is-shall we say 100 gallons!

Lame or not-lame, you guys do know that Jeff Eats is a big Jaxson’s fan (check reviews) and that I am just fooling with you- about the need for psychiatric care…sure I am!

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MEDIA ADVISORY
What:
Jaxson’s Ice Cream Parlor to Announce the Winner of the Broward 100 Ice Cream Flavor Contest. The “Scoop of the Century” will make its debut.

When:
Tuesday, June 16th
10AM

Where:
Jaxson’s Ice Cream Parlor and Restaurant
128 S. Federal Highway
Dania Beach

Details:
Broward County is celebrating its 100th birthday. For the last several weeks, Jaxson’s Ice Cream Parlor has conducted a contest on Facebook asking followers to tell them what the new Centennial ice cream flavor, Broward 100, should taste like. More than 200 ideas were submitted and evaluated by a team of reviewers at Jaxson’s.

The winner will receive an infamous Jaxson’s Kitchen Sink dessert for 4. Broward 100 ice cream will be available at Jaxson’s and during Duende, the Broward 100 grand finale weekend October 2-4, 2015.

Next Steps:
Tuesday evening, June 16th, between 5-8PM the public is invited to come to Jaxson’s for a free sample of Broward 100 ice cream. Please help us communicate this invite to the community.

Media Contacts:
Jerry Smith, Jaxson’s General Manager, 954-923-4445, jerryjaxson@hotmail.com
Shelly Turetzky, Broward County Office of Public Communications, 954-357-6994, sturetzky@broward.org

AmericanDessertsFast Food

Jack and Rita’s Homemade Ice Cream (Naples)

Posted on June 10th, 2015 · American Desserts Fast Food Naples · 4 Comments »

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***** Jack and Rita’s Homemade Ice Cream, 2378 Immokalee Road, Naples, Florida 34110, (239) 260-1407.

The truth be told, Jeff Eats has never met an ice cream cone that I didn’t like…In all my years, I can’t ever remember saying even once- “Boy! This ice cream cone stinks, let me throw it in the garbage.” Now, for sure some ice cream cones were/are better than others- but like I kinda just said, they all work!

Anyway,

Jeff Eats recently came across Jack and Rita’s Homemade Ice Cream in Naples and I gotta tell you that the joint’s HOMEMADE chocolate, pistachio, vanilla and strawberry ice cream in HOMEMADE waffle cones -were absolute dynamite!

I know that you guys are sophisticated-cats, so I’m not gonna waste your time or mine describing Jack and Rita’s Homemade Ice Cream…you know- plenty of free tastes, tons of ice cream flavors, handful of sugar frees, ice cream pies/cakes, shakes/floats, sorbet, sundaes, order/pickup at the counter, handful of tables inside/outside. What I will tell you, is that this “mom & pop” is pumping out stuff- that runs circles around most of the ice cream joints down here in Florida!

You can check menu/prices/info at jackandritashomemadeicecream.com.

Jack and Rita’s Homemade Ice Cream is open 7-days a week noon-9pm.

Music/Events/Other

Happy Together Tour 2015 (Seminole Casino Hotel- Immokalee, Florida Theatre Jacksonville- Jacksonville, King Center For The Performing Arts- Melbourne, Peabody Auditorium- Daytona Beach)

Posted on June 10th, 2015 · Jacksonville Melbourne Music/Events/Other · 2 Comments »

* Happy Together Tour 2015.

Jeff Eats has seen the “current lineups”…no bs-here, all of the acts- put on a surprisingly good show!

Call Jeff Eats and Mrs. Jeff Eats “wild & crazy”…we’ll be at the Immokalee concert!

If the Seminole Casino Hotel in Immokalee doesn’t work for you…Jacksonville (6/16/15), Melbourne 6/17/15), Daytona Beach (6/19/15)- you can catch tickets/info at happytogethertour.net.

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DealsHotels/Motels/Resorts

Hard Rock Hotel & Casino (Hollywood)

Posted on June 9th, 2015 · Deals Hollywood Hotels/Motels/Resorts · 11 Comments »

Seminole-Hard-Rock-Hotel-And-Casino-Hollywood-photos-Exterior-Hotel-information

***** Hard Rock Hotel & Casino.

Real simple story here…

Last week Jeff Eats and Mrs. Jeff Eats were “comped” a night in a mini-suite at the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino in Holywood. Just so you know, the “comp” was based solely on CASINO PLAY and not because I am Jeff Eats of jeffeats.com.

Long story short, even though this hotel is literally in most of “our” backyards- you might want to consider spending a night or two or three…the rooms are gorgeous, the hotel service terrific…the pool area absolute dynamite, free parking and there are enough restaurants, stores and entertainment in the complex- so everyone will find what to do!-and there is also a casino, if that’s your game!

To wrap it up, one day away from Boca Raton- and it was like being away for a week…think about it!

Printed down below is an e-mail advertisement Jeff Eats just received. If interested in checking “this” out- seminolehardrockhollywood.com. If this “deal” doesn’t work for you, the bet here (pun intended) is that the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino will have one that will work!

SHRHC_Eblast_Summer-VIP-Offer_r1_c1SHRHC_Eblast_Summer-VIP-Offer_r2_c1SHRHC_Eblast_Summer-VIP-Offer_r3_c1

Music/Events/Other

You Can’t Teach An Old Dog New Tricks, Then Again Maybe You Can!

Posted on June 9th, 2015 · Music/Events/Other · 5 Comments »

* You Can’t Teach An Old Dog New Tricks, Then Again Maybe You Can!

Politics aside, this dog is a real fast learner!

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