* Jeffrey Ross.

First told you guys about “this” on 6/12/15…Jeff Eats just checked the box-office and there are a handful of good tickets left…I’m thinking that this gonna be a real fun night!

Unless you’re from Mars, Venus, Uranius- you know who Jeffrey Ross is …

Ross’ appearances- on Comedy Central’s Celebrity Roasts are legendary…

Trust Jeff Eats when I tell you- one of the funniest comedians working the circuit today. Ross can go blue or clean- and either way- have you crying from laughter.

Real simple…

Jeff Eats and Mrs. Jeff Eats are going…and you should too!

JEFFREY ROSS
Event Date: Saturday, July 11, 2015 at 9:00 pm
Facility: Stage 305
PLEASE NOTE:
– YOU MUST BE 21 OR OLDER TO ATTEND THIS EVENT.

Tickets: $30 & $75 at magiccitycasino.com
– Tickets for VIP Tables must be purchased in quantities of 4. These tickets are $75 each for a total of $300 per table. Please enter 4 in quantity box when purchasing a VIP Table.
– Purchase of a VIP Table includes a bottle of champagne.
– VIP Tables are located around the stage.
– Show will be performed at Stage 305.

Magic City Casino
450 Nw 37th Ave, Miami, FL 33125
Cross Streets: Between NW 4th St and NW 4th Ter
Neighborhoods: Flagami
(305) 649-3000
magiccitycasino.com
Open:
Sunday-Thursday 10am-4am
Friday-Saturday 10am-5am
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About The Roastmaster
Called “an heir apparent to such old-school masters as Buddy Hackett and Rodney Dangerfield” by the New York Times, Jeffrey Ross is feared and revered for his appearances at celebrity roasts. He also stars in a stand-up DVD, Jeffrey Ross: No Offense, as well as an award-winning documentary about his time entertaining U.S. troops in Iraq, Patriot Act: A Jeffrey Ross Home Movie. Jeff divides his time between New York, Los Angeles, and the road.

A Message From The Roastmaster General
My name is Jeffrey Ross, but I am commonly known as the Roastmaster General. I’m not entirely sure how I got this title, but it has stuck and I am proud of it. Most stand-up comics are self-deprecating. I’m all-deprecating. Sure, I occasionally make fun of myself — but I specialize in making fun of others. I’m what is commonly known as an insult comic. Diss is my life.

I never planned on making fun of people for a living. It happened by accident. In fact, my whole life has been a series of happy and not-so-happy accidents that have transformed me into the black belt in busting balls that I am today. I like being known as the meanest man in comedy, but I must admit that it’s a blessing and a curse. It’s not a bad way to make a living, but every now and then somebody wants to kill me.

* Screw The Dentist!

Just between you guys and Jeff Eats, sometimes you gotta live-life dangerously!

This afternoon, picked-up these 24- beauties for 24 bucks at Nuts About Candy, 2900 West Sample Road (Festival Flea Market Mall), Pompano Beach, Florida 33073, (954) 984-8908…

Here’s a reprint of Jeff Eats’ Nuts About Candy “review” from 1/1/14. Absolutely love this joint’s stuff!
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Nuts About Candy (Pompano Beach)
Posted on January 1st, 2014 · American Desserts Fast Food Music/Events/Other Pompano Beach

***** Nuts About Candy, 2900 West Sample Road (Festival Flea Market), Pompano Beach, Florida 33073, (954) 984-8908.

Call me a wild and crazy guy (I know-Steve Martin), but this morning I woke-up craving some chocolate Bonomo Turkish Taffy. Sounds nuts but Jeff Eats ain’t playing you here.

Anyway…

After a handful of telephone calls, Jeff Eats found a joint named- Nuts About Candy located in the Festival Flea Market that had chocolate, vanilla, strawberry, blue raspberry, wild cherry and banana bars in stock. For the historians out there, Bonomo Turkish Taffy has been around since 1912 and the original flavors were chocolate, vanilla, banana and strawberry–and if Jeff Eats forgets about the cost of 6-teeth implants, is one of the greatest candies ever created.

Anyway…

To make a long story short, this afternoon Jeff Eats and Mrs. Jeff Eats took a ride and found Nuts About Candy (Booths #3327 & 3331) at the intersection of Carnival & Bourbon Street…and I gotta tell you that this flea-market “store” in addition to Bonomo Turkish Taffy had a great selection of reasonably priced nuts/chocolates/candy/nostalgia candy. Now for the craziest part of the story (well at least to Jeff Eats it is)-is that although Nuts About Candy has been in the Festival Flea Market for something like 26 years, Jeff Eats (who has shopped at the Festival for years) had not even once-consciously noticed it…maybe subconsciously, but definitely not consciously. You gotta admit, that’s pretty crazy!

Let me wrap Nuts About Candy up (pun intended) for you…I hate this store-because by 3:30 this afternoon, Jeff Eats’ New Year’s resolution to lose 25 pounds ended as I downed huge chunks of chocolate Bonomo Turkish Taffy-at least 12 inches of button candy and something like 11 Mary Janes. Oh well, 2015 is fast approaching!

Nuts About Candy is a no-frills operation. Guess that’s how it’s able to sell its stuff at prices something like 1/2 of what competitors in the area are getting. By the way, the joint is owned by a real pleasant mother & daughter team Marilyn and Wendy–and in addition to selling packaged candy/nuts, candy/nuts by the lb.-also makes/ships some really cool candy/nuts trays and baskets.

Nuts About Candy’s website www.floridanutsaboutcandy.com is currently down-getting a facelift…but should be up real soon so you can check-out all of its stuff/prices.

The joint is open Monday-Friday 9:30am-5pm, Saturday and Sunday 9:30am-6pm.

***** Bigun’s Bar B.Q., 7280 Sunshine Grove Road, Brooksville, Florida 34613, (352) 596-4180.

Got a really good diner/bbq joint for you guys…Bigun’s Bar B.Q. in Brooksville.

Jeff Eats is thinking that if you’re thinking- “Deliverance” which starred Burt Reynolds, Ned Beatty, Jon Voight and Ronny Cox- kinda “décor”- you’re gonna be on the right page!

So there is no misunderstanding, although the “handle” is Bigun’s Bar B.Q.- the joint in addition to smoked-bbq stuff has all kinds of breakfast items, grilled dishes, fried foods, baked dishes, sandwiches- so on and so forth!

Right up front, Jeff Eats absolutely loved Bigun’s…the food was dynamite and the folks that run the joint are as pleasant as can be.

Bigun’s is basically a breakfast & lunch diner- for good measure it does dinner on Friday.

Just so you have it straight- Bigun’s Bar B.Q.’s hours…Monday-Thursday 6am-2pm, Friday 6am-8pm, Saturday 6am-11pm, closed on Sunday.

Anyway,

Jeff Eats and Mrs. Jeff Eats recently did lunch…beef brisket, grilled chicken breast, meatloaf, French fries, mac & cheese, collard greens, onion rings, corn bread, mashed potatoes, garlic bread -everything and I do mean everything was right on the money!

You can check menu/prices at bigunsbarbq.com.

You! fancy folks out there, this joint ain’t gonna work for you…

Like I said a few seconds ago, Jeff Eats loved Bigun’s!

* America’s Birthday Bash At Bayfront Park.

Your tax dollars are well spent on this one…

Over the years Bayfront Park’s July 4th “events” have been huge winners!

* The Acchords.

A recent e-mail Jeff Eats received.

Jeff,

Planning a 75th birthday party for my husband at our country club in Boca Raton for February, 2016.

We have seen most of the doo wop groups as well as oldies bands in south Florida.

Can you give us the name of a really special group that isn’t one of the south Florida regulars?

We have no problem with a group from out of state.

The way we figure it, you only hit 75 once, so a few extra bucks spent here and there is of no consequence.

Thank you,

Linda Hammerman
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Linda Hammerman:

Jeff Eats recently caught Long Island based- The Acchords at Madison’s Steak House, 670 Motor Parkway, Hauppauge, New York 11788, (631) 231-6909 and I gotta tell you, definitely one of the best oldies groups that I’ve seen in a very-very long time. The group ‘s 50’s-60’s-70’s track show featured fabulous leads and tight harmonies on the hits of groups -such as The Four Seasons, The Duprees, The Jive Five, The Righteous Brothers, The Dubs, The Earls, The Skyliners and The Drifters.

I’m thinking, that The Acchords (who normally don’t play South Florida) would be absolutely perfect for you guys. I’m also thinking that this group would be a homerun- for a ton of restaurants, festivals, country clubs, events down here in South Florida…so all you social directors and booking agents- checkout The Acchords at theacchords.com.

Hope this helps you out and wish your husband a happy birthday from Jeff Eats!

***** DISH OF THE WEEK (Sunday- 6/28/15)

One of Jeff Eats’ favorite menu items…

EVERYTHING

Schnapper’s Hots
1528 Periwinkle Way
Sanibel
(239) 472-8686
schnappershotssanibel.com
Latest Review; 9/15/13

July 4th- is right around the corner…

To be perfectly honest with you guys, Jeff Eats can’t think (actually I can, but play along with me!) of another joint-that so-symbolizes what America is all-about like Schnapper’s Hots does. No fooling, I absolutely love this joint!

Printed down below is Jeff Eats’ 9/15/13 “review”…

Trust me, Schnapper’s Hots is an absolute must try.
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Posted on September 15th, 2013 · American Desserts Fast Food Pizza
***** Schnapper’s Hots, 1528 Periwinkle Way, Sanibel, Florida 33957, (239) 472-8686.

Schnapper’s Hots…fast-food “hot dog stand” with limited standing -room eating inside and limited outdoor seating—located in Sanibel.

Short and sweet, Jeff Eats “lives” for joints like Schnapper’s Hots.

Terrific all-beef hot dogs, burgers, wings char-broiled on a gas grill…equally delicious fresh hand-cut french fries, home-made hand breaded onion rings, pizza, fried fish sandwiches, ice cream cones and shakes—and you got a home-run in this boy’s book. Throw in the fact that the joint is located on a street named PERIWINKLE WAY…and you know you gotta try it!

Check menu/photos at www.schnappershotssanibel.com.

Schnapper’s Hots is open Sunday-Thursday 11am-8pm, Friday-Saturday 11am-9pm.

***** Eat Watermelon!

Way-back on September 5, 2014 Jeff Eats did a story “Watermelon!” It’s reprinted down below.

The reason why I am mentioning WATERMELON is that I really-believe that eating this fruit helps-makes-keeps you healthy!

Look!

I maybe nuts, but- it’s now Watermelon Season and if I’m wrong, so what!

Watermelon tastes great and it’s dirt cheap to buy!

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Watermelon!
Posted on September 5th, 2014 · American Fast Food Music/Events/Other

* Watermelon!

I don’t know about you guys, but when Labor Day hits, that means-end of Summer to Jeff Eats.

Taking that formula one-step further, Labor Day/End of Summer/next step- goodbye watermelon until next Summer.

Anyway,

As I’m sure you know, last Monday- Labor Day 2014 hit…and it got me to thinking about watermelon. Now no bs-ing here, on any given day Jeff Eats can eat 1/2 of a large watermelon-no problem at all. For the record, watermelon is one of my favorite fruits and I recall years ago hearing that it was a very “healthy” fruit.

With the above in mind, take a look at this Watermelon “story” I just read on howstuffworks.com…

For what it’s worth, I think this watermelon “info” is something to definitely have on file in the back of your head. As the late great- Sy Syms use to say, “An educated consumer is our best customer.”

Finally, maybe one of you scientists out there can explain this- How do you grow seedless watermelons from seedless watermelons?
*****

Some foods are fun to eat, and watermelon is definitely one of them. That triangular wedge of bright red/white/green, sweet juiciness forbids us to take life too seriously and shouts, “SUMMER!!!” As if that weren’t enough, watermelon is packed full of nutrition, hydrates and is low-fat. While many of us think of watermelon as a great snack option, when you tally up its nutritive value, you might consider making this all-star a feature player in your cuisine.

Watermelons are an excellent source of several vitamins: vitamin A, which helps maintain eye health and is an antioxidant; vitamin C, which helps strengthen immunity, heal wounds, prevent cell damage, promote healthy teeth and gums; and vitamin B6, which helps brain function and helps convert protein to energy.

Tomatoes have been highly touted as a great source for lycopene, a powerful antioxidant that helps fight heart disease and several types of cancer — prostate cancer in particular. Watermelon, however, has the highest concentrations of lycopene of any fresh fruit or vegetable.

If your little ones don’t dig into their swiss chard, lima beans or spinach — all great sources of potassium — consider offering them a serving of watermelon instead. It is a great source of potassium, which helps muscle and nerve function, helps maintain the body’s proper electrolyte and acid-base balance, and helps lower the risk of high blood pressure.

Watermelon also contains the amino acids citrulline and arginine, which can help maintain arteries, blood flow and overall cardiovascular function.

Alone or in a fruit salad are the most common ways many of us eat watermelon. While eating the meat of the fruit is the best way to take advantage of all of its nutrients, this is one of my favorite bits of summer refreshment. I get a version of this from my local burrito truck. The key to making this great: don’t oversweeten it. With just a touch of sweetness, it’s heavenly.

* Independence Day Weekend Contests and Festivities.

Here’s- Mardi Gras Casino’s “July 4th” plans…

All Jeff Eats can tell you is- a few years ago Jeff Eats and Mrs. Jeff Eats WATCHED one of Mardi Gras’ 70’s costume dance contests- and we had an absolute blast…suffice it to say, we got some real strange people living down here in South Florida! I am telling you, there were some great dancers, some great costumes and some- I don’t know what out there…and everyone had a great time!

Looks to me, like Mardi Gras Casino has a nice day planned…

WHAT: Independence Day Weekend Contests and Festivities
Put on your dancing shoes and 70’s costume to compete in the Mardi Gras 70’s Amateur Dance Contest for a chance to win 1st place and $1,000! Then, sing the National Anthem for a chance to win $1,000 cash and perform in front of a live audience before our spectacular fireworks display! Sign up now at Players’ Club.

People are also invited to watch the contest and fireworks for free!

DATES: Friday, July 3, 2015

TIME: Dance Contest: Begins at 6:30pm on the Veranda (receive contestant number starting at 6:00pm)
Singing Contest: Begins at 8:00pm in the Grandstand (receive contestant number starting at 7:30pm)

WHERE: Mardi Gras Casino
831 North Federal Highway
Hallandale Beach, FL 33009
877-55-SLOTS
For more information visit www.mgfla.com

WHO: Mardi Gras Casino offers over 70,000 square feet of casino excitement featuring over 1,000 of the hottest Las Vegas-style slot machines, including Progressive slots, virtual roulette and blackjack, as well as The Dog Pound, Mardi Gras’ smoker-friendly slot area; 30 action-packed poker tables; simulcast and greyhound racing; entertainment; and various dining options. For more information, call 954-924-3200 or visit www.mardigrascasinofl.com. Become a fan on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/mardigrascasino or follow us on twitter at http://www/twitter.com/MardiGrasFl.

* The Heat Is On At Silverspot Cinema For Premiere Of Magic Mike XXL.

For you ladies out there and I guess for some of you guys out there as well…

On Wednesday-July 1st from 5pm-7pm the brand new 11- screen Silverspot Cinema located at the Promenade at Coconut Creek, 4441 Lyons Road, Coconut Creek is “celebrating” the opening of the new movie- Magic Mike XXL…the details of the event are down below.

Jeff Eats has absolutely no idea why Mrs. Jeff Eats and a bunch of her girlfriends are going- but they’ve already bought tickets- with plans to get their hair done earlier in the day!

Silverspot Cinema is a gorgeous hi-tech theater and its Trilogy Restaurant has absolutely dynamite food!
____________________________

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

THE HEAT IS ON AT SILVERSPOT CINEMA FOR PREMIERE OF

MAGIC MIKE XXL ON WEDNESDAY, JULY 1ST FROM 5 P.M. – 7 P.M.

Photo Opportunities with South Florida Firefighters, Drink Specials & More

COCONUT CREEK, FLORIDA (June 22, 2015) – Silverspot Cinema at the Promenade, 4441 Lyons Road in Coconut Creek, will give new meaning to “happy hour” on Wednesday, July 1 from 5 p.m. to 7 p.m. as moviegoers celebrate the much anticipated premiere of Magic Mike XXL with uniform-clad South Florida firefighters, specialty cocktails and more.

Guests will enjoy pre-movie appetizers, dinner and beverages as they pose with area firemen. The movie will be featured at 7 p.m. and 9:30 p.m. that evening.

Specialty cocktails will include the XXL Dirty Martini with Grey Goose vodka and olive juice; Pumped Up Sangria Martini with vodka, L’Orange and St. Germain; Xquisite Blue Cosmo with vodka, blue curacao, white cranberry and lime juice; Beefcake Martini with vodka, bols yogurt, lemon juice and strawberry liqueur; Peach Fuzz with vodka, peach schnapps, and peach puree topped with sparkling wine and Zin Your Face, an old vine Zinfandel with a unique bold and spicy flavor.

Tickets are $16 for adults and $13.50 for seniors available in advance at www.silverspot.net.

About Silverspot Cinema
Silverspot Cinema is a privately-held, customer-centric company specializing in sophisticated cinemas offering an enhanced, hassle-free entertainment experience in a boutique environment catering to an upscale clientele. Silverspot at Mercato, located in Naples, Florida, marked the initial expansion of Silverspot Cinemas in the United States. Silverspot Cinema recently opened a second theater in Coconut Creek, Florida and currently has 87 screens under various stages of development. For more information visit www.silverspot.net or call (239) 592-0300.

* A Night At Copacabana.

Ever wonder what happened to Ricky Ricardo?

Tonight- June, 26th at 8pm go see for “free” – A Night At Copacabana…and you may very well find out!

Tell- Jeff Eats that the guy with the pompadour playing the Conga Drum isn’t Ricky- or what!

For more info seminolecoconutcreekcasino.com.