A prison guard went into work one day, and he was surprised to see one of his friends locked in a cell. He asked his friend what he was doing behind bars.
“Well, I was out doing my Christmas shopping one morning,” his friend explained, “and then the police handcuffed me and brought me here because they said I was getting it done too early.”
“Well, that doesn’t sound so bad,” said the guard. “I get my Christmas shopping done by the middle of November. How early did you do yours?”
His friend replied, “About three hours before the store opened.”