* The Jewish Firetruck.

A recent e-mail received from long time Jeff Eats’ reader, Norman Goldberg…

——-
Jeff,

One night outside a small town, a fire started inside the local chemical plant. In the blink of an eye, it exploded into massive flames. The alarm went out to all fire departments for miles around. When the volunteer fire fighters appeared on the scene, the chemical company president rushed to the fire chief and said, “All our secret formulas are in the vault in the center of the plant. They must be saved. I’ll give $50,000 to the fire department that brings them out intact”.

But the roaring flames held the firefighters off. Soon more fire departments had to be called in as the situation became desperate. As the firemen arrived, the president shouted out that the offer was now $100,000 to the fire department who could save the company’s secret files.

From the distance, a lone siren was heard as another fire truck came into sight. It was the area’s Chasidic Township Volunteer Fire Company composed mainly of Jewish, ultra-orthodox men over the age of 65.

To everyone’s amazement, that little broken-down fire engine roared right past all the sleek newer engines that were parked outside the plant. Without even slowing down, it drove straight into the middle of the inferno.

Outside, the other firemen watched in amazement and disbelief as the Chasidic old timers jumped off right in the middle of the fire and fought it back on all sides. It was a performance and effort never seen before.

Within a short time, the Chasidic old timers had extinguished the fire and saved the secret formulas.

The grateful chemical company president announced that for such a superhuman feat he was upping the reward to $200,000 and walked over to thank each of the brave Jewish fire fighters personally. The local TV news reporter rushed in to capture the event on film, asking their chief “What are you going to do with all that money?”

“Vell,” said Moishe Epstein, the 70-year-old fire chief,

“Da foist ting ve gonna do is fix da brakes on dis fucking truck.”